I watched as my trainer worked with the horse, he got over his fear of the hose, and fly spray bottle and he was progressing undersaddle. I remember the first time my trainer let me roundpen him for a change, it was amazing. How the most suddle movement could make a horse stop and change direction in the blink of an eye. I watched as he trotted around the ring, his stride long and swift. I eventually was able to ride him on my own, but only at a walk and trot. My trainer had eyes around the barn, "I'm putting alot of work into this horse! If you want to go and ruin it like that, then find your selfs another trainer." she told me when she found out that I had tried cantering him. I kept quiet, I nodded and obeyed. I remember the feeling I had when I would sit in the middle of the ring and watch as the other students in my lesson group worked on cantering. I remember wanting so badly to feel the rocking movement, but was only able to sit on my golden steed and watch.

It was six months since the day that I first met Tig, I could still do no more then a trot but my trainer had told me that I could enter him in a few classes at a local show that weekend. I was so excited, my first time showing my own horse. I dreamed out how we'd take home the blue and leave everyone wondering who the pair of blondes were. He rode like a dream that night, responsive and calm, like he never rode before. I cut the ride short since he was doing so well. We gave him a bath and let him graze while he dried. We took him back inside and my trainer trimmed his long mane so that it was only afew inches short. I remember standing back and watching as the white hair feel to the floor, changing his look completely. She banded it before taking out the clippers. He snorted at the sound of the buzzing and pulled back, she took him into the stall so he couldn't back away and began clipping his muzzle. "We don't have to do his ears but he needs a bridlepath.." she said as she adjusted his halter so that she could clip away a section of his mane behind his ears. Tigger's eyes became wide, he shot his head up and pulled out of her grip. "Andrea can you hold the twitch for me?" my trainer asked as a boarder walked by. I watched as they twisted his upper lip and attached the chain loop to it. His head dropped some and they turned the clippers back on. My trainer moved to clip his bridle path, the sound of the buzzing hit Tiggers ears. He reared without warning, striking Andrea in the arm with his front hoof. "What do we do now?" I remember hearing someone saw as Andrea stood holding ice on her already bruised arm, my trainer standing the stall with Tigger, still holding the lead and twitch. I stood in the aisle and watched my horse, his head was low, he moved his lips alittle, ears moving back and forth. The twitch was in place for more then 10 minutes now, the relaxing effect it was suppose to give had vanished and pain was now replaced. Tigger was fed up, he shot backwards, my trainer lost her grip on both the lead and the twitch. I remember hearing only a loud bang and seeing my trainer stumble out of the stall. He had kicked out with both feet at my trainer, grazing the side of her stomach. If he had been and only an inch to the left he'd had hit her dead on in the stomach, with full force.

"Either sell him or find a new trainer" again I heard the threat, tears swelled up in my eyes. My mom was left with the decision and a decision was made. "Please Mom, please! He wont hurt me, he's never tried to. Please!" I begged her but there was no convincing otherwise. Afew days later I went to the barn to say my final good-bye. He had been drugged, I remember looking in the stall and seeing him with his nose almost to the ground, his eyes half open. He walked like that down the long driveway to where the trailer was parked on the road. He loaded like a charm, the drugs took away his fight. He was taken to a man in Viriginia. There he'd be turned out in a huge field for afew months, then the man would take him out and begin to retrain him, eventually he'd be resold. Atleast that's the story I recieved, I still can't be certain if it's a lie or not. I don't know where my golden horse is today, I hope everyday to get a phone call from his new owners asking to have his papers transfered to thier name instead of mine. According to the AQHA he still belongs to me, and untill I recieve that phone call he still will atleast in my mind.

What lesson he taught me, I can't really be sure. Maybe it's to not hold back, to tell someone when you don't agree or have an opinion. Maybe if I had done that when my trainer threatened me I would still have him. I regret putting him through that much in one night, I regret not knowing that a twitch starts to have an opposite effect after 5 or 10 minutes. Maybe if I knew that I could of said something before he reacted, maybe I could of stood up for him and he's still be mine. Who knows, I just hope that he's out there somewhere, happy and healthy, and has a owner who understands him.